.: ...but knowing about her soon-to-be special day through fb wasn't something THAT i expected.. :.

'slm..fidah npe kol x angkat je..ade terase ati dgn aku ke'-a very good friend of mine sent this sms to me this morning after her 4 unanswered call...n i didn't reply that sms...tot of smsing her on her special day..insya Allah...wondering y am i not replying or answering her call?erm....because i'm hurt obviously...fine..call me a mengade2 or whatever...deep in my heart i really want to attend her special day but i just cudn't..majorly because my relatives are coming to my house to celebrate aidiladaha here n minorly because i'm hurt...is my heart that fragile-handle with care?..erm...i guess so...not just my heart...everybody's heart is but it depends on how u handle it..but my dear..insya Allah i'll try my very best to attend ur big day..if i'm invited.. =)

ppl would say that i'm over sensitive..am i?yeah...i admit..i easily get hurt....but as for now, i've improved as i'm an adult now...i can't be a cry baby anymore..but have u ever heard that we are more sensitive towards ppl that we care n love...i'm sure u have..n i guess because i love her that i easily get hurt...am i a bad friend?by not replying her msg..sms n not answering her call?i just don't know because at the time being, i just cudn't bear to listen to her voice..not yet..

yeah..we r far apart and we rarely catch up things about each other. but knowing about her soon-to-be special day through fb wasn't something THAT i expected. i don't mind not knowing about her life or who she is attached to now. but getting d info about her day through fb...entahlah...mayb i'm not that important in her life anymore..as if she doesn't have my hp number that she has to MSG ME THROUGH FB to inform me about her special day..

maybe it's true that once we are apart, we are stuck in our own world. it's not a maybe anymore...to me..it seems like a fact..

to my dear babe,
aku doakan ko berbahagia selalu..
aku mintak maaf x dpt dtg majlis ko..
aku sentiasa doakan ko...ko lah kwn terbaik yg pernah aku ada...
time kaseh kerana selalu mendengar masalah2 aku...
n selamat menempuh alam pertunangan =)



Dapatkan Mesej Bergambar di Sini

.: kisahku mengawas spm :.

For this school holiday, i've been asked to invigilate spm at one of d school in sabak bernam. I've got this feeling that i will invigilate for this year's spm evethoug i really hope that i won't get the task. but what to do, it is written. erm...fair enough i guess as last year, my name wasn't listed to invigilate any major exam. thinking about the pay, i'm excited but thinking of burning my hlidays....wa..wa..wa..tp x pe lah,...kate 'saya yg menurut perintah'..hehehehe

when i was invigilating, there are many memorable events that i experienced.memorable?erm...not really but it's something good that i can learn ad i would like to share esp with youngsters and school students. the school that i am invigilating is just a ordinary school and all the students there are Malay and Muslims. what makes me sad was their attitude and their spirit. they came to sit for spm as if spm is nothing. when i was invigilating on the 2nd day, english and sejarah paper, 80% of the students left early before the time ends. when i looked at the paper, some of them didn't answer and some of them, erm...at least they wrote something. but amog them, there are a few students who have the spirit to wait until he last seconds. Alhamdulillah, at least the teacher won't be frustrated knowing that soem of them did stay until the end of time. do't you want to know what i think? when i saw them leaving the class, i thought of my beloved students at SMKASL.

i was imagining it was me taking the exam and my parents at home were praying for my success. won't they be hurt and sad knowing that i didn't try to answer the qs? definitely they'll be hurt. so, children out there, your parents will always pray or ur success but if u don't put ur effort, how would Allah fulfill the prayer? it is all back to u. taking it on my side as a teacher. yes i know and believe that human being has own ability and gift. a am math teacher and i believe that to success in math besides effort, it is the ability and Allah's gift to Thy servants. everybody has own ability. i might be good in math but i am terrible in drawing. i admit that maybe i'm not gifted in that field but i've tried my best during my art class when i was in school. as a teacher, i won't be that mad if a students has put their effort but still does not perform in exam. seriously i'm not mad, yet i really want to help them. i've got this kind of student. he never missed to attend any xtra class even if it is not my class-my partner's class and he always asks qs in class n diligent in doing all the exercises, but when it comes to to exam, he still can not perform. but seeing his effort, i am happy enough. compare it to another kind of student. he knows that he is weak. he knows that he has missed classes. he knows that if he doesn't seek for assistance from teachers, he will be left behind. he knows that he doesn't perform well in exam. he knows it but he doesn't put any effort to it.pathetic rite? i, as a teacher, i will be sad and sometimes i lost hope on the student. but please also know that i never missed to pray for my students' success. insya Allah =)

.: dah 2 tahun..... :.

2 years as a teacher...

alhamdulillah...on nov2, 2009 witnessed my 2nd year of teaching...
pejam celik..pejam celik..dah 2 tahun dah..alhamdulillah...so far, i'm happy with my life as a teacher..i'm happy that i've made d decision to b a teacher...

byk benda yg nak dikongsi..kalo tulis...x tertulis..terlalu byk kenangan...teutamanya dgn anak2 kesygn sy...ppl say that i'm too attached to d students...in other word...baik sgt...ye ke?ntah la...wut i see is when we r closer to our students..they respect us more n they r free to share anything with us...byk cite bdak2 ni dlm tgn aku...to me it's better if they share with d teachers rather than just keep it to themselves n d problems won't b solved...

as for me...dis year's form 5 is really special..firstly bcoz they r my first babies...anak2 sulung sy...harapan sy...n honestly, i really put high hope on them...kenakalan diorg ni pon kdg2 wat aku senyum sorg2...aku x kesah sgt...tp jgn sampai pijak kepala...so far alhamdulillah....they made me happy n hope that they will make me happy forever...insya Allah... =)

smka simpang lima...simpan byk kenangan..sape sangka 1 nov 2007 menyaksikan aku ditugaskan mengajar di smka d daerah sabak bernam...firstly, it is situated in sabak bernam...2ndly, it's an smka..hehehehe...sabak?insya Allah...kalo ade jodoh tu la tempat bakal umi mentua...mule2 bukak surat posting, sgt terkejut...nak nanges ke?gelak ke?tp nanges jugak sebab jauh...n gelak sebab never tot it would be that place...pegi aje la...

n i am really glad that i've been posted to d school...sejujurnya...sy rasa sgt2 bertuah kerana sy terpilih mengajar anak2 d smka simpang lima..kwn2 pon sgt supportive n baik hati...alhamdulillah...dpt housemate yg memahami n kw2n yg cool sgt2..

byk yg aku dpt belajar kat sini...pengalaman yg mungkin susah nak dpt di tempat lain...kat sekolah ni aku dpt byk peluang...insya Allah aku akan cuba menggunakan peluang itu sebaik2nya...

tp...sebagai seorg manusia...masalah akn sentiasa ada...biase la..kat mane2 institusi pon...mesti kite akan ade masalah...sekurang2nya dgn ade blog ni...dpt lah aku melepaskan ape yg terbuku d hati...sebagai manusia...aku pon reti penat...kdg2 wat keje sampai lebih dr tahap kemampuan diri...bak kate otomen.. 'x reti penat ke...' die yg tgk sy kerja dh rase penat...huhu... kdg2 tu penat...tu yg terlepas mcm2...huhu...

erm...2009 plak dpt geng baru...edzna, intan syahmi, safarin n harvin...geng2 bujang...lg semangat la sy sebab dh ramai geng bujang....lebih enjoy..alhamdulillah...hubungan kami sgt2 la akrab n baik...bersyukur sgt2....

2010 diharapkan menjadi tahun yg lebih baik utk sy...walaupon sy x dpt pindah...sy harap sy akan terus menikmati2 saat indah sebagai seorg teacher di smka simpang lima...

proud to be a teacher =)

.: KETIKA CINTA BERTASBIH :.

MELLY FEAT AMEE

Bertuturlah cinta
Mengucap satu nama
Seindah goresan sabdamu dalam kitabku
Cinta yang bertasbih
Mengutus Hati ini
Ku sandarkan hidup dan matiku padamu

Bisikkan doaku
Dalam butiran tasbih
Kupanjatkan pintaku padamu Maha Cinta
Sudah di ubun-ubun cinta mengusik rasa
Tak bisa kupaksa walau hatiku menjerit

Ketika cinta bertasbih nadiku berdenyut merdu
Kembang kempis dadaku merangkai butir cinta
Garis tangan tergambar tak bisa aku menentang
Sujud syukur padamu atas segala cinta

Bisikkan doaku
Dalam butiran tasbih
Kupanjatkan pintaku padamu Maha Cinta
Sudah di ubun-ubun cinta mengusik rasa
Tak bisa kupaksa walau hatiku menjerit

Ketika cinta bertasbih nadiku berdenyut merdu
Kembang kempis dadaku merangkai butir cinta
Garis tangan tergambar tak bisa aku menentang
Sujud syukur padamu atas segala cinta
Cinta...

Ketika cinta bertasbih nadiku berdenyut merdu
Kembang kempis dadaku merangkai butir cinta
Garis tangan tergambar tak bisa aku menentang
Sujud syukur padamu atas segala

Garis tangan tergambar tak bisa aku menentang
Sujud syukur padamu atas segala cinta
Ketika cinta bertasbih nadiku berdenyut merdu

.: announcement :.

finally...d result is out...

officially i would like to announce that...i failed to transfer back to putrajaya..

seems like i hv to stay at sg besar for another one year...or is it going to be moooooore years?

ntah la...susah nak dikata....berbalik pada rezeki yg ditetapkan olehNya...kuasa yg tiada tandingan...tak terjangkau dek akal fikiran kite...

benarlah...kita hanya mampu merancang...tp Allah yg menentukan segala-galanya kerana DIA adalah perancang yg terbaik utk setiap hambaNya...

as a Muslim, i hv to redha...eventhough, i was crying like dunno-how-to-describe...until my mom was so worried n she even came to meet me at sg besar after hearing me crying so badly...i didn't eat...i didn't do anything for d whole day...

it's not that i don't like d school...i LOVE the school...but i've appiled for transfer... i've put high hope on getting d transfer...tp nak wat cam ner...inilah namanya x de rezeki...

erm....walaupon jeles tgk kak anas n kak ani dpt pindah...tp aku x mampu melawan ketetapan yg ditetapkan olehNya...ya Allah, berikan lah aku kekuatan utk menghadapi ujianMu ini...ku mohon ketabahan utk menghadapi hari2 yg mendatang...insya Allah...sekurang2nya rezeki ku maseh ader d SMKA simpang lima...

these few days...agak down...tp slowly, i've gotten d spirti back...wake up!!!!come on...it's not at d end of d world....life must go on!!!!

insya Allah...doakan saya yer =)